Sometimes a Light Suprises

"Though the fig tree should not blossom, nor fruit be on the vines, the produce of the olive fail and the fields yield no food, the flock be cut off from the fold and there be no herd in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the Lord; I will take joy in the God of my salvation. God, the Lord, is my strength; he makes my feet like the deer's;
he makes me tread on my high places." Habakkuk 3:17-19

I come back to this verse that I wrote on a couple of months ago. At the time, I was wrestling through some doubts, fears, despairing thoughts, and disillusions. I'm glad that God takes me through valleys of sorrow to bring me to rivers of joy (thank you JoC).

It's good to be reminded of where you were, and the rest you could find when the vines were fruitless and the fields were fallow. I trust in God not because the blessing is evident, but because the Blesser is ever-present. It's good to be reminded of God's grace and evident mercy when the blessing is evident. I don't want to forget that as well and pray the Spirit continues to make that evident.

When I think of the happenings of the past 6 days...I'm blown away by God's reminder of blessing. He has been and always will be the giver of all good gifts. I'm pretty thankful for the good gift that He's brought back into my life recently. Many of my pining and questioning entries over the last 4 months have been my heart's pull toward this person, and I couldn't be more excited that God has renewed that relationship as if we hadn't skipped a beat and cultivating it to glorify Him as the source of all joy.

This song by Indelible Grace has been ringing in my ears/heart all day, and the basic message reminds me primarily of how the shining light of God into the Christian's heart which jolts the senses, awakens the eyes, and rejuvenates the affections...what's been dead has been resuscitated to new life. When I think of it, it also reminds me of that relationship recently brought back to life..."Sometimes a light surprises the Christian while he sings, It is the Lord who rises with healing in His wings, When comforts are declining, He grants the soul again; A season of clear shining, to cheer it after the rain... Yet, God the same abiding, His praise shall tune my voice; For, while in Him confiding, I cannot but rejoice."

I love it...enjoy!



Sometimes a light surprises
The Christian while he sings;
It is the Lord who rises
With healing in His wings:
When comforts are declining,
He grants the soul again
A season of clear shining,
To cheer it after the rain.

In holy contemplation
We sweetly then pursue
The theme of God's salvation,
And find it ever new;
Set free from present sorrow,
We cheerfully can say,
Let the unknown tomorrow
Bring with it what it may.

Tomorrow can bring us nothing,
But He will bear us through:
Who gives the lilies clothing
Will clothe His people, too:
Beneath the spreading heavens
No creature but is fed;
And He Who feeds the ravens
Will give His children bread.

Though vine nor fig tree neither
Their wonted fruit should bear,
Though all the fields should wither,
Nor flocks or herds be there
Yet, God the same abiding,
His praise shall tune my voice;
For, while in Him confiding,
I cannot but rejoice.

Let your Will Be Done in Me

When a song shuffles on the itunes that I really need to hear, I can't help but be thankful. It may be the Calvinist in me, but I tend to view those situations as providential. Today was no exception...God has used this CD to be a comfort and a peace when my souls been disquieted recently, and "As Long as You Are Glorified" is no exception. Oh, that I would be to the praise of His glory regardless of the pain or blessing. It's my prayer and hope, and I hope it blesses you too. I hope to be reminded of that tonight at Lampmode's Tea Time...should be dope (thanks Brian for your influence...trying to get in the right mind frame for tonight :)!

"In love he predestined us to be adopted as his sons through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves" Ephesians 1:5-6 (NIV)

A Philly Phriday

Some days are like this. Some weeks are like this. I'd spent the last 3 months substitute teaching at a great school with 5th graders in the morning & Kindergarten/1st graders in the afternoon. I loved these kids from the moment I met them and hated to go when their teacher came back from maternity leave. Some days they were crazy and some days they were angels, but they never ceased to amaze me. Technically, they were in special ed programs, and the word special is definitely underrated. Yea, most struggled with behavioral issues, learning disabilities, autism, intellectual disabilities, etc., but they were/are so much more than that. They were special because they fought to be "normal", persevered in spite of ability, made huge strides in their education, and learned that they could "do it". I miss them all ginormously!!

So, this week was the first week back to day-to-day subbing. I took a day off here, took a couple of half days there, and just took the week easy. I thank God for the flexibility of substitute teaching especially how it works with my grad class schedule. But grad classes are over...so this week was just lovely to relax, go to a coffee shop, watch a movie, read a book (or several), try new places, and meet new people. Some of my favorite new places to hang are BBP in University City with some of the most unique and fantastic burgers I've ever become acquainted with, the Memphis Taproom with it's rotating local on tap list, beer battered pickles (to die for...which is convenient bc they might kill ya), and smoked coconut & tofu club, and the Rocket Cat Cafe which from it's Shepard Fairey external mural, to it's bagels with homemade Apple Maple Ginger Cream Cheese (divine!), to solid coffee, & it's predominantly hipster, urban gentrified clientele...I think I've found a new love in Fishtown!

So, as I was ruminating on these things this morning before spending a half day with a great group of life skills students at the nearby elementary school, I was reminded and overjoyed at God's graciousness to me. I often overlook the moments that I have to just sit and reminisce over his goodness. He's provided affordable housing & transportation, a job that I love more each day, and good health. He's given me great and encouraging roommates, great friends that sharpen me continually, and an amazing body of believers in NE Philly that have truly become my family (away from family). He's blessed me with a great family that I love, would do anything for, and even thought they're far away that we can still be close.

And, if that wasn't enough...God's given me His Son, rescued me from my own self-induced damnation, given me a new heart to serve Him with, reconciled me to Himself, the Creator of the universe, and daily transforming me more and more into the image of His Son...I couldn't ask for more, but to be freshly affected by it and to be drenched in humility to worship Him all the more. So, as I sat in the Rocket Cat this morning...eating my bagel with apple maple ginger cream cheese and slowly sipping on a cup of java, I thanked God...as I wrote, I named ways He's shown Himself lately. As words of praise echoed in my earbuds, I sat in wonder of who He is. As I sat this evening with friends outside...grilling out, watching the Phils (squeak out a close (but authoritative) victory over those lowly Braves), and fellowshipping, I thanked God again for all His good gifts that we don't deserve, but are continually grateful for...He's definitely worthy of our praise!

Beauty in Letting Go...

Beauty in Letting Go

Holding on to much, needing to relinquish my grip
On the things I can't control that grant me service with the lip
Dripping like pools of substance though empty to the draught
In the wind whispering echoes of engagement that come to naught

Seeking in self, falling in fear, drowning in despair
Knowing though not trusting like trying to grasp the air
Loosening grip as the Spirit beckons me come and drink
Life waters given as one leaves it all the brink

Running start, jumping and letting go, falling weightless
The wind rushing past jet streams of savory sweetness
Hands open, palms up, arms outstretched being overtaken
Arms of grace engulf, waves of mercy wash never shaken

Peace found in relinquishing the me that seeks to destroy
That sinking me holding on to self like a child with a toy
The Father's joys are greater to those whose hearts are his
Faith arouses the adopted's affections to resuscitating bliss


Beauty of Letting Go by Green Ordinance initially inspired this post. Honestly, I'd forgotten the song, but the song title had been ringing in my head the past couple of weeks. I love it because I am continually reminded of things that I can't control, but try to often (with disastrous results). God reminded me again how the new life in Him resuscitates the heart when it seems bleakest. Like Aron Ralston, it may take time, but some things need to be let go of. Reading 2 Corinthians 4 the other day just rocked my world. I love verses 16-18 because this passage shows the tendency to despair, the "seeming" reality of bad circumstances, the sanctifying grace in the process, the way to "not lose heart" by looking to the unseen, and the faith demanded by trusting in God is the only faith that's really legitimate. Love these verses...

So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.(ESV)

Beauty of Letting Go by Green River Ordinance

Stand outside these city walls
And feel the forces swimming strong
You're bathed in starlight, pulled through ocean tide
It hits you here, tonight and

And you're falling out of all you were
And you're finding out the beauty of letting go

Spend our whole life stuck in alright
Me, I've been there, sung that song before
Don't let your smile turn with the tide
You'll shine again, you're soon to find

That you're falling out of all you were
And you're finding out the beauty of letting go
And you're falling out of all you were
And you're finding out the beauty of letting go

You're waiting for the right time, waiting for the right time
Oh, you're waiting for the right time, waiting for the right time
Oh, you're waiting for the right time, waiting for the right time
Oh, you're waiting for the right time, right time, now

Oh, you're waiting for the right time, stop waiting for the right time
Oh, whoa, you're waiting for the right time, stop waiting for the right time
Oh, whoa, you're waiting for the right time, stop waiting for the right time
Oh, you're waiting for the right time